Lessons Learned in 2019

Thank you 2019 Hello 2020

2019 was a challenging year in many aspects, but the lessons learned make everything a gift. Top lessons learned in 2019:

  • Insecurity, lack of confidence, anger, resentment, and impatience are by-products of fear. Fear robs us of any kind of peace and contentment.
  • Others’ behaviors and criticisms can only affect us if we let them. Others’ opinions of us, or about what we do, are unimportant and fleeting.
  • What we don’t like in others is often what we don’t like in ourselves.
  • Each of us is enough, just as we are. We don’t need a good “review” or validation from anyone else to prove that. There is no need to compare or compete with anyone else. We are who we are. And each of us is enough.
  • Not to take a single second for granted. Each moment is a gift and wishing for the next one robs us from what is right now.
  • No matter how busy life gets, there is always time for what is important to us. It’s all about prioritizing.
  • Spending quality time with family & friends is one of the most healing, energizing, and healthy ways to spend your time, emotionally, physically, and mentally.
  • Perseverance builds strength & character. Walking through the tough times, instead of running from them, yields worthwhile results.
  • The biggest lessons and greatest peace come from the hardest trials.
  • Taking a time-out is healthy and okay.
  • Completing what needs to be done, even though we don’t want to, making the best of it anyway, is fulfilling and rewarding.
  • It is possible to balance family, a day job, a writing career, and live a Christian life. All it takes is mindfulness of how time is spent.
  • We can either focus on the problem or the blessings. Choose blessings.
  • Perseverance and mindfulness are beneficial in all areas of life.
  • Focusing on self too much creates dissatisfaction and discomfort.
  • Silence truly is golden. Talking too much in a conversation or thinking about your response when listening to someone else, robs both people. It’s okay not to talk unless you have something valuable to add. Talking just to “fill a gap” is usually harmful.
  • Fear doesn’t change the process or the outcome. It does, however, hurt productivity and the way we perform.
  • Gossip is toxic to the person being talked about, to the person doing the talking, and person talked to.
  • Pressing “pause” to fully nurture relationships that are important is one of the greatest blessings.
  • Not taking things personally makes life a whole lot more enjoyable!
  • We can’t change anyone else’s behaviors nor should we try. Others’ behaviors are not about you and me, and that realization is freeing!

Have you learned anything in 2019 that you will bring with you into 2020? Please share.

“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” ―C. S. Lewis

 

“I” is for…

Insecure

I was so grateful to stumble upon the website Insecure Writers Support Group.  Realizing I wasn’t the only insecure writer on earth was such a relief. Somehow, knowing I’m not alone in the sea of insecurity helps rid me of the albatross that at times makes me feel like a fraud, certain that everyone else is better at writing, at creating, at word combinations…

Why is it so natural to compare oneself to another? To allow ones self-worth to be defined by what someone else accomplishes?

I have learned through the years, however, that when I’m feeling that obnoxious, uncomfortable stirring in the pit of my belly, I’m usually taking my writing and myself too seriously.  Writing is something I love to do more than almost anything else, but when I’m wound up in knots over whether I’m “good enough,” it sucks the enjoyment right out of it.  Besides, I’ve begun to ask myself, “Good enough for what? For whom?”

How good my writing is–or isn’t–is not what defines who I am, and that’s a burden lifted.  I am a mother, wife, grandmother, child of God, and yes, I am a writer (I love those words! 🙂 ).  Those roles combined make up who I am.  And with that I’m more than okay.  In fact I’m happy, content, at peace.

If you haven’t visited the Insecure Writers Support Group website, I would highly encourage you to do so. It contains a wealth of information and resources.  And who among us couldn’t grow from that?

In the comments, please share your favorite writing website.

Insecure Scarecrow

Peace.